FOR all those who have a hard time making decisions, this is for you. In her excellent book “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway”, Susan Jeffers points out that when we have a decision to make, we tend to look at it in terms of making either a right choice or a wrong choice. As a result, we find ourselves paralysed by being too scared of making the “wrong” decision.
Her suggestion is that we change our perspective and consider both choices as being right. No matter what happens, whichever decision you make, it won’t be wrong . . . it will simply result in a different outcome. Either way, there will be new things to learn, new people to meet, new opportunities will open up, and so on.
She calls it the “no-lose model”, and this perspective can really open one up to the possibilities of choices, rather than feeling restricted by them.
I know the feeling of being paralysed by indecision only too well. Several years ago I was absolutely incapable of making a decision as to whether or not to end a long-term relationship. Without the benefit of a crystal ball, I was so scared of making the “wrong” decision that I literally couldn’t move. In the end, I did make the choice to end the relationship and, within three months, had met the wonderful man that I now share my life with.
The point is that, even if I hadn’t experienced this admittedly fairytale ending, I know that lots of other opportunities would have come my way and — as Jeffers emphasises — I would have been able to deal with any of them.
V ANNABEL SUTTON is a professionally-certified life coach and author of 52 Ways to Handle it — a Life Coaching Year, available from Neal’s Yard Remedies — see www.nealsyardremedies.co.uk — priced £6.50. To contact Annabel or subscribe to her free life coaching tips, email annabel@ life-designs.co.uk or visit www.life-designs.co.uk
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