Amid the lovely countryside of South Lakeland, it was with sheer delight that we found ourselves royally entertained by 20 performing sheep. This is an area which is not perhaps as much visited by North-Easteners as other parts of the Lake District and which has many surprises up its sleeve. But 20 rams on stage was a jaw dropper. The Sheeptacular was part of the three-day Holker Hall Festival. It is a huge event on a 25-acre site in the grounds of Holker Hall, the home of Lord and Lady Cavendish, and it is an occasion which the English do so well - lavish horticultural displays, exhibitions, demonstrations, performance arena, Made in Cumbria marquee and more craft and product tents and stands than you could shake a carved stick at. One attraction was, improbably, a race over 100 metres by three rams. Not an everyday sight, and it had the crowd off their straw bale seats. Happily, this was to lead us to the later performance of the Sheeptacular in an adjoining marquee. Now in the old days Hughie Green's Opportunity Knocks TV show achieved cult status among me and my mates. Tongue-in-cheek we religiously sent in our weekly votes for the daftest or most bizarre act. Our favourite was the Mavis Whitehead Accordion Band, 14 little lasses with large accordions and conducted by the formidable Mavis. Next best were the tap dancers on stilts, followed by the Whistling Welder from Tyneside and a bloke with a singing Jack Russell who, coincidentally, sat on a straw bale. But the Sheeptacular surpassed the lot. It consisted of a stage with a backdrop painting of mountains and two stepped-up Olympic-style podiums, accommodating a total of 20 platforms. The farmer-compere beckoned a different breed of sheep at intervals from the wings, with the animal skipping on to its designated spot marked with descriptive name plate. Being a townie, you think sheep are just sheep? Reconsider. This was a one-off chance to learn all you need to know about sheep breeds, and whose wool makes the best carpets. There was the Beulah Speckled Face, the Brecon Hill Cheviot cross, the four-horned Jacob, the Ryeland, whose fleece supplies the Woolsack in Parliament, the Wiltshire Horn, which does not grow any wool at all. Their versatility showed there is more to sheep than just being grass processors. When all the sheep were safely stacked on stage, gazing glassily at the audience as the audience gawped at them, it was a cameo which will long live in the memory, as will the rather earthy smell of the performers. A short head behind the sheep in the entertainment stakes was the Harmonious Blacksmiths band, featuring gentlemen of a certain age playing drums, accordion - there it is again - and tuba. The annual festival is well established as one of Cumbria's premier outdoor events and this year celebrated the county's countryside, food and other products. At a time when the reaction against processed and anonymous food is growing, the quality of local produce on display was mightily impressive. But after such close acquaintance with the Sheeptacular cast, I found it morally impossible to take home a mutton pie. Page 2: Sparkling days on the lakeside | 
